Last Night I Googled Longing

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Last Night I Googled Longing

Written by Mitch Ditkoff

Tuesday, 08 March 2011 09:18

Last night I googled longing. What I found surprised me. Ninety percent of the images were women. Women dreaming. Women staring out windows. Women brushing their golden hair beneath the full moon. Oh... and lots of goddesses, too. Where were the men? Hunting buffalo? Watching the Superbowl? Mowing the lawn?

OK. Maybe men don't stare out windows or wait by the door for their wives to return home from war, but surely they are feeling something. Surely, men want more out of life than just a cheeseburger, beer and a tattoo. No?

According to Google (the closest thing we have to tracking the collective unconscious), apparently not.

Are men incapable of longing? Not at all. It's just gotten a bit suppressed — gone underground to a place where even Google's algorithms can't find it.

The reason? I'm guessing it has something to do with the male concept of survival. After all... wars, hunting and politics aren't all that conducive to inspired quests of the heart. To put it bluntly, most men consider longing a girly thing. A sign of weakness. A minor holiday card invented by Hallmark. Something you express only because it's expected of you.

I suggest we put an end to this madness once and for all. Longing is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength.

And before I go on, let me make one thing abundantly clear: when I refer to "longing," I am not referring to a poetic kind of "desire" or a beatific "wanting." Not at all. I am referring to the innate human aspiration — beyond gender — for something timeless, pure and unconditional.

Poets write about it, but it has nothing to do with words. Musicians compose about it, but it has nothing to do with notes.

Feeling. That's what it's all about. Deep feeling. The recognition that what we're looking for is also looking for us. What lovers feel after they must take their leave. The artist's pause, inspired by a sudden shift of light.

The ahhhh moment.

And so, dear readers, as the self-appointed President (and Chief Hun) of the Longing Liberation Front for Muscle-Bound Males, allow me to (Chest bump! High five!) refer you to someone who truly understands the game of life. A fine gentleman who knows that the ones who win are the ones who feel — the ones who long for something more than what they see with their own two eyes.

May I introduce you to Coach Rawat?

Illustration by Sara Shaffer.

34 Comments

David Gittlin makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Monday, 28 March 2011

Brilliant, funny, and informative. Thanks again, Mitch, for your enjoyable insights.
raul acosta hdez makes this comment

Anoche busqué “nostalgia” en Google

Thursday, 24 March 2011

a sido maravilloso recordar parte de mi vida y el asombroso encuentro con maharaji
Ana Belchamber makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Wednesday, 23 March 2011

That is absolutely lovely.
heather joy westley makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Monday, 21 March 2011

Wow Mitch! Your expression makes me almost want to be male....just so I can chest thump high five in recognision of your so aptly expressed words. cheers heather joy
Juan-Xavier Borja makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Sunday, 20 March 2011

Thanks for coached me in Mr Rawat ! Thanks to Mitch also, for making the effort of "transducing" a feeling into words. Longing to see my coach again. !
Minne makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Sunday, 20 March 2011

Yesss... Thank you! True longing is not an emotion but a feeling and thanks to "Coach" Rawat I have come to understand the difference.
Thomas Schlifke makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Sunday, 20 March 2011

I do enjoy your article! Truth may not only be a bad surprise; learning not only through calamaty ( as coach Rawat did recently point out ) is what we should and can learn more and more. A "realistic attitude" to reality and listening to the coach Rawat is what I dig like you and your open talks in this matter are very refreshing to me! A good feeling :-)!
alma makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Saturday, 19 March 2011

loved it
Eleni Pouliezou makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Saturday, 19 March 2011

May I heartily applaud your comments dear Mitch! The self-Knowledge taught me by Mr Rawat has been the only thing to allow me to transcend the boundaries of gender - whether female or male - longing is definitely ungendered and if we can only feel with the heart, and not simply think with the gendered mind, we can all find freedom from the stereotypes assigned to either illusion.
serge dalug makes this comment

Last Night I Googled Longing

Saturday, 19 March 2011

Hi. Nice comments on longing. Its a good reminder, thanks.